Date Everything, the game that’ll let you get intimate with your vacuum cleaner without risking an embarrassing trip to hospital, finally has a fresh release date

Wahey, your plans to shag every object in your house this summer are back on. Virtually, I mean, as indie dating sim Date Everything has just announced a new release date. It was previously set to drop at the very fitting release that is Valentine’s Day, but it’ll now be coming on June 17 instead.

Not heard of it before? Well, if you’re into putting on a pair of special sunglasses and getting it on with a door, piano, or laundry basket that might be voiced by the likes of Final Fantasy 16’s Ben Starr, the Horizon series’ Ashley Burch, or Baldur’s Gate 3 sass manchine Neil Newbon, that’s the gist of Date Everything.

As well as announcing that new release date – which again is June 17 – developer Sassy Chap Games has put out a fresh trailer. Introduced by Skylar, a character voiced by Fallout: New Vegas and Supernatural actress Felicia Day, the trailer introduces you to your magic “Dateviator” glasses, and shows you how different objects will suddenly come alive whenever you look at them for a few seconds.

It’s less freaky than it might sound. For example, the house’s front door turns into Dorian, an uber-attractive himbo with a gravelly voice and beard who also happens to rock some visual cues that’ll remind you of his day job as a thing with a knob.

Similarly, a wall becomes a Conan-style barbarian called Wallace, a water heater reveals itself to be a half-Greek godess/half-Dalek called Winnifred, and there’s a hoover bloke called Hoovie. Overall, the game boasts 100 fully voiced datable characters, with even a toilet being teased at one point in the trailer.

“Relationships can be unpredictable, after all,” our Kelsey wrote in their preview of the game last month, “Dating your floorboards, empty coat hangers, or games consoles is no doubt even more unpredictable, but one thing that Date Everything looks to guarantee is that it’ll be relaxing, wacky (and replayable!) fun – akin to the goofiness of Hatoful Boyfriend and Monster Prom. What good company it keeps, which I think is very fitting for a game with this theme.”

Hey, if it’s another chance to flirt with power-fisting enthusiast Veronica Santangelo, assuming Day’s character is also one of the dateable folks, I’ll take it.