5 Things Christian Singles Wish the Church Could Understand

Raise your hand if someone at Church has offered to set you up. Look at that – nearly every hand raised. Now, raise your hand if someone at Church has prayed with you to continue living single for God’s glory. Hopefully, as many hands went up, but probably not. In our church culture, single is often interpreted to mean “I need help getting un-single.” And while we do need help, lots of it, God will handle the “getting un-single.” We need the Church’s help with a bigger problem.

And being single is not our biggest problem. In light of God’s Word, it probably does not even make the top ten. Our biggest problem is the same as everyone else’s: We are sinners. And, without Christ, the wages of sin is death, eternal separation from God. But, with Christ, we can live in freedom from sin and freedom to serve God. And that’s what we need help with: living the Christian life.

Like married church members, we need prompting to continue obeying Christ and displaying Him to others. We need to be encouraged that our service to God and others has value and worth. We need the fellowship of other soldiers in this fight of faith, others who will pick us up and say, “God always wins. Keep fighting! I’m here for you.” God will address our singleness in His way and in His time. But until then, remember, we need your support to take up our cross daily and follow Christ. We need your help to continue on as dedicated, useful, and beloved servants of our God.

Learn more about Alisha’s newest book, Confessions of a Christian Spinster:

Being single in today’s church often feels like a waiting game. You’re put on hold in ministry, service, even spiritual growth until you say “I do,” and you’re either pitied or not seen at all. Unlike today’s church, God is not mystified by the presence of unmarried Christ-followers in the pews. In fact, he has masterful plans for those without a ring on their finger. Alisha Plummer points out how God is eager to empower them with purpose and passion.

In Confessions of a Christian Spinster, Alisha explores God’s design specifically for Christian singlehood through amusing tales and scripturally based truths. She tackles the difficult questions the church often ignores, like: Where do I fit in? Does the church even want me? Has God forgotten about me? What happens if I never get married? Further, she confronts the church, calling for an adjustment to its couple-centric culture, and asking Christians to understand that their single brothers and sisters are not only valued by God but integral to his kingdom.

Singles will feel seen through Alisha’s words; they’ll be encouraged to seize their role in the church and inspire their pastoral staff to reinvent their culture on singleness. is a powerful resource for those seeking to live and thrive in a perplexed church–and a way forward for the church itself.